Love at...50th sight?

Cinderella is the movie that almost every girl wishes her life could resemble. She wishes she could go from being a normal girl to one night meeting her “Prince Charming” and experiencing “love at first sight.” I am not knocking specifically on girls at all, because I’m sure there are guys that believe this too; but I do think the idea of love at first sight is complete crap. Granted, it is a nice thought, but is that really possible? Let’s be honest here; say I’m walking down the sidewalk on my way to English class, and my eyes catch the eyes of a girl and there is “love at first sight.” Can you really call that love? What do I know about that person? I know she is attractive, and….yeahhhh that’s about it. I mean, if I base love on how attractive a girl is, then I love a whole heck of a lot of women here at Tech! Seriously though, I know absolutely nothing about her. I don’t know her name, where she is from, what kind of personality she has, or if she is even single. In my opinion, the word “love” is abused, and “I love you” is said way too much. People say it without meaning it, because they want to think that they are in love, or they don’t know what true love really is. The last two weeks I have been trying to figure out what real, genuine love is, and how do I know if I am really in love with somebody? By taking what I have been taught by other people, by my past experiences, and by what I am taught through my faith, I think I have figured it out.

First of all, I believe that love is not the deep, passionate feeling that I get when I think of somebody. My old youth pastor once said, “Love is not an emotion, it’s a choice.” He went on to explain that some mornings he wakes up next to his wife and he doesn’t feel like he is married to her. He doesn’t have that warm, overwhelmingly happy feeling that he got, say, on their wedding day or on their honeymoon. Does that mean he doesn’t love her anymore because he doesn’t feel that way? No, of course not. He still loves her with everything he has; he still will always be there for her and want what is best for her and protect her at all costs. If we judged love by how we feel, then every couple would get a divorce at some point, because there are always going to be times when that passionate feeling is not there. From personal experience, there have been times when I have really wanted to say “I love you” to a girl because I was so emotionally attached to her, but I knew I shouldn’t say that because I did not truly love her. It would have given her false hope and happiness, and I believe that love is a word that should not be messed around with. So, for that reason, I have never said “I love you” to a girl I was dating, because I honestly haven’t loved any of them.

So, I know what love is not, but finding out what true love really is is a bit more difficult. This is where I turn to my faith for the answers. Having been raised a Southern Baptist Christian, I have been taught that The Bible is 100% true, and that I should live my life based on what it says. Therefore, I looked up some verses about love, not only to try to help me figure out this crazy, controversial issue, but because I want to find out if I really do love this certain person in my life; and, if I do, then, how should I act toward her so that I show that I really do love her? One night, I was in the hot tub talking to my friend, Jared, about it, and he said that he thinks that if you are willing to die for that person, then you love them. I was like, hmmm, that makes since, because I remembered a verse I had learned that said, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. – John 15:13.” He asked me if I would die for her, and I said that I would. Then, I got to thinking; there are other people I would die for, so how do I know what real love is between a man and a woman? While I love my family and my closest friends and would die for them, it’s not quite the same thing. So, I believe being willing to die for that person is a major part of it, but it’s not the only thing. Last week, I was looking hard to find the answer; and, between talking to another one of my friends and reading a couple more verses, I got a better understanding of it. The verse that made everything click was this: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a.” This is an example of what true love should be like. While I mess up in many of those areas, love is not perfect, and it does not mean that I don’t love her because I’m not very patient or because I might let my pride get in the way every now and then. However, these are the things that I should strive to improve on; I should want to be patient and kind to her; I should protect her and forgive her when she does wrong and place all of my trust in her and put her before myself. It’s not a checklist saying that if I do each of these things just right, then I have come to the point where I am in love with her. It’s saying that that is the guy I should be for her and what I should strive to be like.

The third thing I learned about love is that it is unconditional and should never end. When a man and a woman marry each other, it is a profession of their love for each other. They say, “’till death do us part,” not, “’till we have a problem, or I don’t feel like I love you anymore.” This is one thing I have never understood about marriages. Now, I’m not an expert on love; but I do know that when you marry somebody, you are saying that you love them, and that you want to be with them for the rest of your life. I know that when you love somebody, you should want to do whatever it takes to make the relationship as strong as possible which includes working out any problems that come up. I know that when you love somebody, you should want to put their needs before your own, because their happiness is important to you. I know that if you love that person then you should be patient, forgiving, kind, trusting, etc. with them, because that is what true love really is. So, why do so many marriages fail? What problem is so big that it can’t be worked out? What makes one spouse cheat or suddenly “stop loving” the other? If love is unconditional; if love is all those things in that last verse, then why do marriages end? It doesn’t seem right to me that such an incredible and rare bond can be broken like that. It’s sad that we (as people in general) give up so easily on such a great thing. So, having taken everything I have heard and read, I believe love is not just a feeling; it’s willing to give up one life for another; it’s patient; it’s kind; it’s trusting; its unconditional; and it never ends. That, my friends, is much more than just a Cinderella story.

Summer in Paradise

All the time people are stressed out about school or work or dating or whatever is going on in their lives, and you hear them say, “I just need a vacation where I can relax and get away from all my problems for awhile.” May I suggest Hawaii? I have been to Hawaii twice but only the most recent trip do I remember, because the first trip I went on I was one I think. Of course, I wanted to go back because I would hear stories about the first trip from my parents and see the pictures; and, after all, it is Hawaii. My parents said that, since I was graduating the following year, I could pick our summer vacation spot. We had saved up a lot of Delta Skymiles, so cost wasn’t too big of an issue. I enjoy some sight-seeing, but I prefer vacations where you learn and walk less and just relax and have fun more. Hawaii is mostly relaxation but has many amazing sights, so that seemed like the idea vacation spot to me. So, one morning very early but not so bright, we got up and drove down to Roanoke “International” Airport (that’s what my dad calls our airport as a joke because it’s so small) and got on a plane to Atlanta. Atlanta is one massive airport if you haven’t been there; it is very easy to get lost, but for us expert travelers, it was fairly easy for us to follow the signs and get to our gate. The plane we got on in Atlanta was massive; it had two aisles and seven seats in each row. I mean, for a nine hour flight from Atlanta to Honolulu it’s got to be one heck of a plane right? During the flight, they served us two meals, and they played Fool’s Gold and National Treasure 2. The entire flight I had Follow You Home by Nickelback in my head, and I thought I was going to die it was so annoying. Anyway, we land in Honolulu, Hawaii and it was so weird because of the time change. We had flown for nine hours but it was still only the afternoon. In order to get to where we were staying on Oahu, we had to get on one more small plane to go from one island to the other. Once we landed in Oahu, I saw the weirdest looking airport I had ever seen. It wasn’t the traditional metal building with windows everywhere; it was little shacks and places where there was just a roof with columns supporting it but there were no walls. The whole airport was just open to the elements and had a very beachy look. As we were driving to the place we were staying, the air was full of what looked like smoke or fog; later we learned that it was neither, but it was I think it was called vog. It was the smoke that came from the volcanoes that made the air thick and dark. Also, instead of grass or forests, much of the area was just black rocks. They were igneous rocks from years of volcanic activity that had covered the ground. Later that night, we get to the place we were staying, get unpacked and situated, and just kinda chill for the rest of the night, excited about the rest of the trip.
The next day it was hard for us to get up, because our bodies were still on Roanoke time. However, once we realized we were in Hawaii and not boring ole Roanoke, it didn’t take long for us to get up and moving. We went down to the beach, and marveled at how gorgeous it was. Hawaii has some of the most clear, blue water you will ever see. I could stand in the ocean with the water all the way up to my neck and look down, and I could clearly see my feet. One time I was completely scared to death, because I saw out of the corner of my eye a big black thing swimming through the water, but it ended up only being a sea turtle. Another day, my dad and I went to play golf at one of the many beautiful courses in Hawaii. Instead of grass, the course had that same black rock everywhere that we saw earlier, which made it easier to find all our bad shots that missed the fairway (there were many of those). One particular hole was so scenic that it looked like something you would see in a magazine or on TV. The green was backed up to the ocean, and there were a few palm trees surrounding the green with a couple bunkers next to it. For the rest of the time on Oahu, we went to the pool and the beach and shopped a bit and enjoyed some of the great food that Hawaii has. We went on a short hike to this waterfall that was in the middle of this massive open area in the mountain, and we drove along the road, stopping here and there to take pictures of all the beautiful views. That was the first of our islands; then, we went back to that cool little airport, got on another plane and headed back to Honolulu for the last half of our trip.

Honolulu reminded me of a smaller New York City. There were plenty of big buildings, lots of pedestrians on the sidewalks, and crazy night life. Even though it was highly urbanized, Honolulu also had many beautiful, well-known attractions just like Oahu. Some of those that we saw included Diamond Head Crater, Waikiki Beach, Black Sand Beach, and Pearl Harbor. We took a boat out to where the U.S.S. Arizona had sunk and went to the monument there. It was really quiet, because it was an interesting thought to think that this was the place where so many people had died that day. There were still oil bubbles floating up to the surface of the water from the Arizona. All these things were beautiful and lots of fun, but nothing we did compared to when we went snorkeling. We went to this place that was a volcano crater, but one side of it was gone, letting it fill up with ocean water; and over time, it had grown coral and become inhabited with hundreds of fish and sea creatures. None of us had ever been snorkeling before, and I thought it was one of the coolest things I had ever done in my life. The only downside to it was my back got burnt to a crisp from being right at the surface of the water for hours. One of the last nights we were there, we went to a luau where they had some good Hawaiian music and food including some purple rolls, no joke. Eventually the end of the trip came around and none of us wanted to leave, because it was like living in paradise. The trip back was horrible; that day I spent about 22 hours including time change flying back to Roanoke and sitting in airports. One cool thing about coming back was that I saw both the Staples Center in Los Angeles and the Georgia Dome in Atlanta in the same day which I thought was neat. I could easily write another 1300 words about my trip to Hawaii, but I won’t do that because I’m getting tired of sitting here typing but if you want to know more about it just ask. I would highly recommend Hawaii for anyone who wants to go on an incredible vacation; I would go back in a heartbeat. Just make sure you take me if you go!

Hard Rock? Thumbs Up or Thumbs Down

Music is a big part of my life. I listen to music constantly while I’m walking to class, driving, doing homework, and pretty much any other time you can think of. The other day I had a thought. It wasn’t a deep or profound realization or theory, but it was something that I found interesting. You have heard people say, I wonder if something looks different to each person. Like, if I saw a bright, colorful bug crawling on the sidewalk; and, to me, it looked light blue and dark green. Would somebody else see that bug but the colors show up different to them? If so, then why? My thought runs along those same lines. Why is it that some people like a certain type of music, while hating a different kind; and other people like type of music that those people hate? Why do certain types of music appeal to some people’s ears but make others’ bleed? If the same notes are going into everybody’s ears, why do some people want to listen to them over and over again while some people make a disgusted face? Sometimes it is blatantly obvious when music is bad; just watch the first few weeks of American Idol. However, world-renown bands and artists such as The Beatles, Metallica, Linkin Park, and 50 Cent are different cases. Each have sold millions of albums and have fans that flock to see them perform. It is obvious that each has outstanding fan support; but, at the same time, they have millions of people who dislike their music and would have to be paid to go see them live. Judging by albums sold and concert attendance, it can be easy to determine which bands are the best. However, base that judgment on the sound of the band, and then there will be a never ending argument between fans and those who oppose them.

My roommate and I are the perfect example of what I am talking about, and it was largely in part to comparing the songs on our iPods that made me have this thought. We both have almost the exact same amount of songs on our iPods: I have 1248, and he has 1238. However, the other day when he looked at all the songs that I have, we realized that we only have 35 of the same songs. That came out to be only 2.8% of our iPods to be the same. We get along great, but we always argue about music. I like to listen to rock, metal, and rap; he listens to primarily oldies stuff (I call oldies anything before 2000). All the time we tell each other to listen to a particular song that we like and usually the other doesn’t like it at all. One day back in high school we were like, ok. I’ll listen to three songs that you pick, and you listen to three songs that I pick. So, for that period we tortured each other with our favorite music. It is basically an implied rule in our dorm room that we have to use headphones while listening to music, so it won’t drive the other up the wall. The point I am trying to make is, it is interesting to me how we have such different tastes in music. I was listening to the exact same songs that he listens to that one day in class, so why did I think it was horrible music but he loves it? I don’t really have an answer, because I have no idea why that is the case. He likes music from the older decades, but he wasn’t alive during those times; he just decided he likes that style of music. I’m about the same age as him, but I decided I hate it. Just the fact that people can be so different and have their own preferences and likes, and sometimes they are the opposite of others’ is interesting to me.

Not only are one person’s views of music sometimes different from another, but one’s views of music can dramatically change as well. I am probably the best example of this. Growing up I was not a passionate music-listener if that is a word. I mean, I had some CDs that I listened to but it was not a big part of my life to listen to music. In the beginning of middle school, I mainly listened to soft stuff like Christian contemporary music such as Michael W. Smith and Avalon and the like. I was pretty closed minded to music, and I only liked my style. My best friend, Jared, was into metal and more popular music like Green Day and Trapt and bands like that tried to get me to listen to his music but I thought it was horrible. I said that a lot of what he listened to wasn’t really music because all they do is scream. He even burned like four CDs for me, but I didn’t like hardly any of the music on there. Then one night, I went to a concert with my youth group, and there were many bands there that played my style of music but there was another artist there called Tobymac who was more hip hop, and I actually loved it. From that concert on, I slowly began to broaden my interest in music types. I went out and bought a Tobymac CD and started getting into more upbeat, hip hop/rap music (I used to say that music was like candy, you throw away the rappers because I hated rap). Also, I started to put up with heavier and heavier sounding bands, going from normal rock with some good guitar and not too hard vocals to a lot more bass and footpedal to ultimately liking the stuff that I once said wasn’t music because all they did was scream. Now, Jared and l listen to almost identically the same music. Sure, much of it was his influence, but it is still funny to me how my music taste has drastically changed over the years. So, going back to my initial thought, why do people like music that others hate even if they hear the same stuff? I still have no idea, but it keeps life interesting!

From Hype to Gripe

So, I’m sure most people watched the Virginia Tech and Alabama game this weekend. We had all been anticipating that game for months so finally game day was here! I had so many feelings and emotions running through my body that it was ridiculous! I, of course, was excited from all of the hype and anticipation that was built up but at the same time I was nervous and discouraged because everybody was picking Tech to lose and not giving them any chance to win. I wasn’t too worried though because one of the main reasons that people were saying Tech would lose was because Darren Evans wouldn’t be playing, but we are very deep at the running back position, and I knew Ryan Williams would run well. Another reason I was hopeful was because Alabama has a freshman quarterback and a new offensive line, so they would be inexperienced; and if we blitzed them hard, it would throw them off and rattle them enough to make mistakes and not play up to par.
Saturday night eight starts to roll around and I’m getting myself all pumped up and excited for the game as one of my best friends gets to my house to watch the game with me. I’m watching the BYU and Oklahoma game as I wait for the commercials to end and the real game to start! At this point I’m so nervous that my stomach is up in my throat, and I can feel my heart pounding in my chest. As I’m waiting for the opening kickoff, I cannot keep my legs from bouncing up and down to save my life from all the nerves, and my friend is just laughing at me because she is a tech fan, but doesn’t get into the games like I do. Alabama kicks it off and right from the beginning we fumble the kickoff which did not help my nerves any. However, I ignored it and looked forward to see what the offense would do. Just as the kickoff had let me down, so did our opening possession: three and out. This was followed by an Alabama field goal which did not give me a good first impression of our team. Our second possession was a three and out followed by another ‘Bama field goal. Overall, I thought that the defense played very well for awhile. Greg McElroy only went 2 for his first 12 passes and was even forced into throwing an interception.
Unlike the defense, however, our offense did not show many signs of life. I was not until the third or fourth possession that we even drove into Alabama territory. That was short lived and that drive ended just like the previous ones did. It was frustrating to watch Tyrod Taylor play, because he was not on his game at all. Many of his throws were shaky or erratic, and many completely missed the mark all together and sailed way out of bounds. Another thing I was confused about was why he did not run the ball more. He is a dual threat quarterback so why did they not take advantage of his running ability to spread out the defense and keep them on their toes? As I thought about it, one conclusion I came to was that, because we do not have much depth at the quarterback position with two inexperienced freshmen, it would have been bad if Tyrod had gotten injured. Even still, it is important to be aggressive and to use the strengths that each player has, and I think that if Tyrod had scrambled more, it would have opened up both the passing and running game more, because the defense would have been cautious about him running the ball. Instead, Alabama put solid pressure on us all night that wore us down. Our running game was not very effective and their defensive line was getting into the backfield way more often than it should have. I cannot say that I was entirely surprised that our offense played so poorly however. Virginia Tech’s offense has never been its bread and butter, and I saw a stat during the game that said that Tech was 111th in the nation last year in pass yards per game. I mean, really? It does not look like that stat will improve much judging by Saturday’s game; Tyrod ended up going only 9 for 20 with not even 100 yards along with negative rushing yards for the game. Shall we blame Stinespring for continual lack of production on offense? I think it might be time for him to go.
Not all of Tech’s performance should be criticized, however. We showed many bright spots in our still young team that I was pleased with. Ryan Williams did a great job filling in Darren Evan’s spot, rushing for 71 yards on 13 carries including one spectacular run down the sideline that was finished by a strong dive for the pylon for a touchdown. He also had a great catch that put Tech deep into Alabama territory which set up another touchdown run. Dyrell Roberts had the clear play of the game for the Hokies with a 98 yard kickoff return that gave Tech the lead by one. Later in the game, he had another strong kickoff return to close to midfield. Roberts will be an exciting and promising player to watch this season and I look for many big things to come from him. Tech’s defense played well, all things considered, through three quarters. Alabama did not score at all in the third quarter and after the game clock hit 00:00, we still had the lead.
Unfortunately, a football game is four quarters long, not three. As soon as the last quarter hit, everything went downhill. Alabama quickly drove down the field and scored a touchdown which was followed by a two-point conversion that killed our momentum. After that point, I believe our defense was a combination of tired and unconfident and could never get a good push to stop Alabama’s offense. So after all was said and done, I was furious and extremely disappointed by the 34 to 24 score that I saw on the television. I went upstairs quickly so I wouldn’t have to talk to anybody about the game and went to bed. Ironically, my alarm that was set to go off the next morning was a song, and the first thing I heard Sunday morning were the lyrics, “one final heartbreak.”

Peter Hwang

Despite the fact that “[his] favorite thing to do is a computer game like a typical Asian,” Peter Hwang is not just a typical college student from Herndon, Virginia. When asked to describe something unique about him, Peter’s response was, “I bet no one has the same DNA sequence as I do!” Unique people give unique responses and that one was no exception. However, he did admit that this answer came from his aspirations of being a biology major even though this path is not set in stone Peter admits.
Peter is not only a unique individual, but he is also very well rounded with a wide variety of interests and talents. Along with playing his computer games, Peter also enjoys sports such as tennis and basketball. Grace Hwang, Peter’s sister, even says that her favorite memory that she shares with Peter is when the two of them danced like Michael Jackson together. She also says that he is an exceptional cook. “I don’t remember when he started cooking but everything he makes turns into gold,” says Grace. She then went on to say that she particularly loves his spaghetti and described it as “killer,” adding four exclamation points to the end.
Observing Peter’s favorite activities is one way of telling that he is well rounded, but getting to know the man on the inside solidifies the statement that he is a unique, well rounded person. On the surface, it may seem like he is a quiet, reserved guy who tends to keep to himself, and in part this is true. Peter describes his personality as “friendly but timid.” He says that instead of talking to other people about his problems, “I sit in my room and think about what caused the problem and the solution for the problem.” His sister also says that Peter does not often tell his true feelings. However, this quiet nature is only one side of Peter. In order to discover his other side, one must get to know Peter beyond initial meetings and first glances. He says, “It’s hard for me to know a person but once I get to know him/her I am a really good friend.” Grace describes his personality as funny and, seeing how Peter enjoys playing practical jokes, it makes sense that he also has a sense of humor. One particular misadventure at the mall shows that Peter has a crazy, outgoing side of him as well. While shopping, Peter discreetly placed three shirts in a friend’s purse. The plan was that as they were leaving, Peter would stop, take the shirts out of her purse, and ask as her if she was trying to steal those shirts. Sounds like a good joke right? Well, it didn’t go quite as planned. Yes, Peter succeeded in pulling off the prank; however, instead of removing all three shirts from her purse, he forgot one and accidently left it in her purse. Thinking the joke was over and they could carry on with their shopping, he and his friend proceeded to exit the store only to set off the alarm from having “stolen” merchandise. That was where the joke quit going as planned in case you didn’t pick that up already. So how did Peter try to worm his way out of the mess he created? It was not easy trying to explain everything to the store manager and security but somehow he got away with no punishment. He apologized to his friend and “decided to never make those joke[s] again or at least mess them up.”
Above all things, the most important part of Peter’s life is his family. They mean everything to him, and he said even though his friends are important, his family still comes first. Peter and his family are initially from South Korea all the way up until 2001. He has two younger siblings, a sister and a brother. He also considers his cousin, Daniel, as his closest friend other than his direct family. “I have been living close to him since the age of eight. He is [a] really good friend of mine, or a member of the family,” says Peter. His sister says that he “looks out for the people he loves” and when asked about the biggest change that she has observed in Peter’s life, Grace says that she noticed that Peter has grown in maturity and that he cares more for his family. He follows his parents’ example and attends church with them whenever they go, crediting his life in the church as a major influence in his life. Peter’s sister thinks highly of the relationship that she has with him. Grace says, “We like to fool around, make jokes, and tease each other…I think that’s [what] makes it so special, we have fun when we’re together.” According to her, the two of them have much in common such as the same type of music they listen to as well as style of clothing they like to wear. Peter may sometimes mess with his sister like all big brothers do but Grace still knows that he loves her very much and thinks highly of her. She says, “and most importantly, we act like we hate each other (mostly him) but I know in my heart that he actually cares about me.”
Peter Hwang knows the importance of being a well-rounded individual. His commitment to school, church, and family shows that he prioritizes what is most important in life; and he gives each one of those things his all. He says that if he could give one piece of advice it would be to live for the future. He says that if he works hard in the present “I would be proud of what I did now when I actually grow up.” So whether you see Peter at a family reunion, playing basketball, or on the computer playing a game, he is a devoted and intelligent person in any aspect of his life that he gives effort to.